There are two ways to work the steps. Quickly, like the original members of AA, or using a step guide with questions that help you go deeper in the step. You must choose which method you use.
AA Trivia . . . In the beginning of AA, men and women were taken to a private room where they were asked to get on their knees and turn their lives and their wills over to the care of God (3rd Step) BEFORE they were allowed to attend their first meeting.
This message board offers both choices because there is a longstanding problem of people never finishing the steps because they are overwhelmed by all the paper work. In early AA, the only writing was the fourth step.
I did the short version, with the help of my sponsor, in 1982. Then I went back and used one of the guides around my love addiction and codependency. Both helped.
I still work the steps. I memorized them and can now talk in Step language. LOL Have your done your tenth step today?
Last Edit: Jan 9, 2020 20:08:47 GMT -8 by Susannah
I started doing the Steps back in April, on my own (at that time, this board did not offer as much personal walking-through - but I was in a bad place, so I went ahead and got started.) I did ask for (and receive) help from another member with Steps Four and Five.
I’ve gotten up to Nine. I’m feeling a little trepidation about reaching out to people to make my amends. But I know I need to do it. I tracked down phone numbers and addresses for those people. I just need to have the courage to reach out now.
I attend a weekly CoDA meeting, and we review one of the Steps for each month (Step One for January, Step Two for February, etc.) In addition to LA, I think I have a lot of codependency. I used last week’s meeting to do some talking and thinking about Step One.
Last Edit: Jan 7, 2020 5:51:22 GMT -8 by RoseNadler
I would like to work the steps with you. I have been on this board off and on since last April. I have worked my way up to Step 5 in the Alanon Program but with the LAA, I keep relapsing and I start over.
I have been in graduate school but just finished. The stress of school made it much worse. I am 62 yo and have been a love addict unknowingly since I was about 18. I have never acted on it sexually. I have been married to the same man for 34 years. He is a good man, and we are good to each other. I married him because he was safe, not because I was madly in love. That a whole other story. But I have never felt really satisfied with the relationship my whole married life but I try to make the best of it.
Anyway, this love addiction thing that causes me such guilt and shame. I met a much younger man in grad school and there was a powerful, mutual attraction. He started to wait for me after classes or sit with me in the library. I knew not to go down that road and I withdrew. I still having feelings for him and long for him. It drives me crazy. But he is just a symptom. I want to heal.
I know it is a process but just can't seem to get over the hump. I want to finish the Steps this time but need guidance and support. I need your help. Sexless W has been a wonderful support too in the past and I am grateful for her too!
Last Edit: Jan 9, 2020 10:05:16 GMT -8 by Susannah
Great. I look forward to working with you on the condition you help someone else with the steps when you are finished.
I have created a Step Journal for you. You can cut and paste the step and then type in your journal the answers to the questions at the bottom of the steps. I will respond to each step with comments and suggestions. If all goes well, we can check off the step you completed and then move on to the next one.
Memorize each step as you go along. At the end we will do a Skype session where you will be required to recite each step and tell me what they mean.
When you are all finished, you should have more self-esteem, more information about yourself, and more spirituality. This whole process should not take more than a year.
P.S. Take your inner child on this journey
Last Edit: Jan 9, 2020 10:03:59 GMT -8 by Susannah